Monday, May 22, 2017

Don't switch on me, I got big plans....

*Blasts Blem by Drake, peeks in and hit the matrix to avoid the shade...* 

Hey loves! How are y'all? Let's just pretend the fact I haven't been on your inbox for the past month didn't happen. Mmkay. Thanks. 

Way back, I had a talk with someone and they were talking about their work, which is also "motivational" (I use quotation marks for me here, not her, because I'm still trying to gauge what you would label these emails - if there is a label at all). She was talking about taking a break and I told her I wouldn't want to give anyone watered down versions of my creativity. And then here we are...
I was sitting at the computer a month ago, and my fingers didn't move. I closed the laptop and said "I ain't got it", this going to have to be a Tuesday email this week. Tuesday was the official one year anniversary of these emails anyway (March 14th). I would definitely be on a high tomorrow. Tuesday turned to Wednesday which turned to Saturday, which turned to I'm going to send it Monday, no point now. Then Monday came and I was like "welp - still don't got it". Lol. I realized I needed a break. I was getting mentally foggy. I didn't have the same inspiration.  I wasn't even reading my books! And I ain't wanna write y'all no bullshit. Plus, life came at me fast (I'm still tight this domain name isn't available). I figured I would take a small break and create the site (finally) and go on my vacation and I'd be full of all the warm fuzzies I needed to hit y'all with some hot shit. 

Negative. I was still off (someone joked its cause I'm still fasting and don't have enough protein). I have been reading my Bible and listening to all my go to TED Talks and sermons and nothing. If you follow me on IG and snap, I was even asking for tips. 

Then, the big homie God had enough of my nonsense. He used a friend to hit me with the word "when I need motivation I remember why I started", but because I'm stubborn, I still ain't get it. Then I saw a random post that said " Student says, 'I am very discouraged. What should I do?' Master says, 'Encourage others.' BINGO B*! I started these emails because I wanted to my friends to get the inspiration they needed to keep going. The inspiration I wish I had the days my ADD also known as being an adult kicked in, No one really knows all the things that someone is going through and it was all the "This was right on time" responses or the deeper connections I made with friends because something in the email sparked something in them and they wanted to talk. It was the fact I realized maybe the break was needed but to always get back because writing was my saving grace. 


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